096. Chance to Speak

Translator’s Corner (Yet another graphic scene in the Translator’s corner, as for the novel: Circus Translations does not endorse consumption of alcohol by a minor or otherwise)

Standing upon the balcony, a benevolent smile on her face, with a sky blue dress covering her body, Yuuko was an angel incarnate. She was never a particularly beautiful woman, but at this moment, her face shown with profound joy.

「A-Aiko… what are you doing there, come down to us.」

Doctor Oda said, sweat appearing on his face. He was desperately trying to dispel the suspicions forming in his mind.

「Doctor, that is not my name」

The angelic voice replied much to his horror. A low murmur filled the hall as people were trying to understand whether this, too, was part of the entertainment that awaited them. In some sense, it was.

「Yuuko..?」

Oda asked hesitantly. A wide smile forming on Yuuko’s face, she replied,

「Bin~go! Now then, gentlemen, allow me to end this party on a… heated note. Exits have been locked for my convenience」

And pressed pressed a button she was holding in her hand. The sprinkler system went off. But before the guests could grumble about the ruined suits, they noticed that something was amiss. Particularly, that water did not fall from the sky. Gasoline did. Yuuko took out a lighter from her bag, lit it and held it in her hand.

「Gentlemen, if I see you reaching into your pockets or attempting to call anyone, I will drop this below and you will all burn to death. I mean, sure the firefighters might arrive in time… Actually, by all means, please call them! You will survive with extremely horrendous burns. You will probably lose some limbs and stay crippled for the rest of your life! But… you will live. Aren’t I merciful? You didn’t let Aiko enjoy life. But here I am letting you enjoy yours!」

A wicked smile on her face, she was by no means an angel. No, if anything, she was the devil. The guests, faces pale, could not utter a single word out of shock.

「… But, that would be no fun. I am not a murder. Hence, here’s your way out of here. See Doctor Oda? You have thirty seconds to rip him apart with your bare hands. Starting now. 30, 29, 28…」

By the time the count has reached 20, Oda could no longer scream but would only emit a gurgling sound. Probably due to the blood that was filling his lungs. By the time the count reached 0, his corpse could only be identified by a professional coroner.

「Very good!」

Yuuko exclaimed, clapping her hands in delight–like a child who was greatly amused.

「But I lied」

She added, and dropped the lit lighter. And a dozen new screams filled the hall.
.

.

Saint Demon Confrontation Arc

096. Chance to Speak

I called Gerudo over to help with putting things back in order.
The Yellow Numbers’ manufacturing ability is surprisingly high. So I’ll have them work hard returning things to normal around here.
And though Gerudo was quite upset at having no opportunity to fight this time around, he happily accepted my request.
Thus, they quickly got to work.
The demon steel reinforced tunnels we had built proved unnecessary, so I’ll have them fill those in as well. Since demon steel is very useful, we can’t just leave it lying around, now can we.
And that’s the thought that made me realize,
Thad I had forgotten about a very serious matter.

「Crap… I forgot about Veldora…」

The moment I thus muttered, the surrounding Department Heads all froze.
They exchanged glances as if seeking advice from each other with their eyes.
The knights looked at us with a face full of suspicion, but we have no time to alleviate their worries.
Now then, what to do…
Whenever I tried making eye contact with any department head, they would turn away.
How reliable! I get it, you hate it.
Well… it is really hard to come up to a guy who was raring to go and tell him「Just kidding, we’re done already, all good!」
He’ll definitely rampage.
Not that there’s another choice here.

「It can’t be helped, I’ll go and explain. The rest of you return and rest up.
The knights too, take a bath and relax.
Those with ruined equipment will probably need no clothing too…」

The knights looked at me as if they could not understand what I was saying.
Well, I guess bath culture exists only in Ingracia Kingdom, so it’s not a surprise if they don’t know…
And they probably can’t imagine monsters taking baths.
Hmph, prepare to be surprised! Our baths are far better than the ones in any royal capital around.
We have great reviews, so rest up.
As for clothing… Those partnered with Ranga have lost everything but underwear.
To advertise our country, let’s give them some of our newly developed hemp jackets.
The girls can choose to wear a yukata, so there’s plenty to choose from.
Seems like with effort we can eventually restore their armor, but that’s impossible right now. Not that it will stay like that for long.
From the looks of it, Shion is also not wearing armor. Though she seems to be able to call up clothing at will.
It’s just a feeling, but she probably had some grand battle with the knights.
Those that can’t walk are being carried by Ranga’s pack.
I decided to leave the knights with Hakurou and had Souei deliver a message to Rigurdo.
Rigurdo can probably manage to prepare baths and clothing for all of them.
Now it feels like we’re preparing for a banquet… well, I guess it’s fine. I mean, we’re always at it anyways, and we recently expanded our fields as well.
It’s that, you know? Party after some big event?
I think it’s a custom basically wherever you go.
Thinking these things, I ventured off to Veldora.

Afterwards, out of rage, Veldora destroyed the tunnel in an explosion and flew into the sky.
Aiming for the tired Knights from above, he gracefully aimed at them.
He’s been releasing his aura the whole time in dragon form, so his anger seemed to have abated slightly.
Good thing I had him release it before he started his assault on the knights.
Basically, this old geezer (not that he is actually) just wants to rampage. He’s only dangerous if he doesn’t get to unwind once in a while.
I think we’ll need to prepare such a place for him for future use.
For us, though, this was all a story we could laugh about.
For the knights he attacked, it was a nightmare.
I mean, imagine being completely drained, and then having a nightmare-like being descend upon you.

「Geeeeh!! Veldora!!」

And,

「Abababababa!!」

They screamed.
What a funny reaction they showed.
I would have loved if you could see it, but I guess I also felt sorry for them.
Well, I wanted to make sure they would not assault us every again, so this might have been perfect timing for his appearance.
Hmph, I wonder if Raphael had also planned this?.. Nah, I guess not.
There’s no way Raphael could have predicted this far, so let’s not overestimate Raphael too much.
I mean, the fight with Hinata had gone completely according to plan, so this was just a thought I had.
So with this and that, I guess we can close this confrontation story by saying that it was our complete victory.

* * *

When I returned to the city, the knights were already taking a bath.
Rigurdo, as always, was running around handling food preparations and the like.
Souei should have notified him a while ago, so there’s no need to rush, I think… it’s probably just his personality.
But to think that he even ran around asking whether there was any food they couldn’t eat because of their religious preferences! Really have to respect him for his diligence.
I bet that he’s been talking to merchants and adventurers learning about the human culture for a while now.
Rigur, after making Gobuta the garrison squad leader, has been supporting his father Rigurdo. Isn’t he a fine successor for Rigurdo?
But who’d believe that he was a simple goblin until not too long ago?

The banquet hall.
We’re often having banquets, so make it! I declared a while back, and they quickly built the building.
It’s about the size of a gymnasium, and is dome shaped.
The inside has wooden floors with a tatami floored seat of honor.
In worst case scenario, since this building can house so many people, it can be used for evacuation purposes.
The building is quite large so it had to be built sturdy.
The skeleton of it we had reinforced with steel, but we’re planning on changing that to demon steel eventually. If I think about it, just how privileged is our country?
Just when I began thinking this, I saw food brought out on waiter tables.
Well done. As you’d see in an expensive restaurant, the food is inside a hand crafted bowl.
When I had some time, I tried baking one out of clay, and the children, who saw me do that, decided to imitate me.
As a result, every house now uses such bowls made by children.
Moreover, the bowls have gotten rather pretty recently.
Their vividly colored, whether using medical herbs or some other dubious method, and appear truly grand.
Seems like a lot of experimentation went into making them.
The table they are carried on is also an example of intricate craftsmanship.
To think that it was made with the leftover material…
Looking at all of this, from the onsen to the tableware, my tastes are reflected in all their actions.
Considering my current pleasant lifestyle, the time I spent munching on grass seems unbelievable.
I can also enjoy food now. I’ve really been working hard, right?
Today’s menu is tempura. Wonderful.
Looks exactly right, and the taste is great. Made by Shuna. Not, I repeat, not by Shion.
Shion’s all brawn and no brains, and even if she has a cook skill, I cannot leave everyone’s meal to her.
This Tempura was slowly developed after showing Shuna my memories.
She’s worked really hard. But, it was only possible because I had memories, albeit vague, about its taste.
Even Ingrasia Kingdom, which had an abundant variety of food, did not have Japanese meals.
True Japanese meals, even among the World Travelers, must be truly rare.
She really has worked hard.
I mean, in order to make something like dried bonito, we’ve gone off to the sea to catch fish in large quantities.
And since we can easily transport it while preserving its freshness via spatial travel, we’ve gotten our hands on a great variety of ingredients.
We are at the pinnacle of food culture.
I, personally, think that a country that has a poor variety of food is pointless.
Among the three basic necessities–Food, Water, Shelter–the most important one is food, after all. Though I guess that might depend on the person.
Which is why, even by going to absurd lengths, we’ve developed many dishes.
The current problem is white rice. Wheat, on the other hand, we’ve easily acquired.
I mean, I’ve seen rich people eat white bread in the royal capital. So, we’ve been able to reproduce that product easily.
The problem is: rice.
I couldn’t imagine that this grass family did not exist, so I passionately set off to look for it.
But, compared to millennia of selective breeding that Japanese Rice had undergone, what we found was no where near as tasty.
But that’s only to be expected. I didn’t think this would be easy.
So, we’re currently in the middle of modifying the plant.
The thing is, my plan is actually really simple. I asked Raphael if there was a way to quickly fix it, and a simple answer was presented before me.
That was: altering the plant’s properties using Shion’s『Cook』skill.
But how will that go? I can’t imagine the properties taking root permanently.
So, I’ve been doing that with my ability to change just a small portion of the rice (in fact, just my portion).
Shion would get a big head if I let her do it, so I did it myself.
This time, however, I had Shuna allow me to do it to the knights’ portions as well.
Today is special. They don’t know the beauty of my country, so I plan to show it off to them.
Carrot and Stick. Crush them with overwhelming power and then treat them very nicely.
The knights might not be that easy to sway, but I have a feeling that this will be pretty effective.
Well, white rice is my obsession though, so maybe the knights will hate it.
Tempura is widely popular, with Adventurers and merchants loving it.
By the way, we also tried growing some rice on magic energy-rich water.
The result was a pitch black rice, as if squid ink was mixed into it. It’s also unbelievably tasty.
But it doesn’t look very appetizing. And it’s poisonous to humans.
We called it demon rice, and it has a surprisingly high nutritional value (for monsters).
At some point it has become the primary food of Tempest.
And just the fact that it can hold that much magical energy makes it a rare good.
Thus we finished the preparations for the banquet and were awaiting the knights’ return from the baths.

…………
……

The knights got out of bath, dressed in either the yukata or the jacket and came to the banquet.
It wasn’t clothing they were used to, but they seem to have taken a liking to it.
Well, that jacket is basically like a jersey–really comfortable to be in. It’s the best type of clothing to wear indoors.
Some fear on their faces, they were guided to their seats.
The Goblinas leading them weren’t at all worried, and moved naturally. They are surprisingly good at this.
The knights are also surprised I bet. There’s no extraneous movement about them.
And, thanking the Goblinas, Hinata seemed to have made up her mind as she looked at me.

「This incident… I bear sole responsibility for the trouble we have caused you, and wish to apologize.
I do not believe I can  be forgiven for this, but please treat my subordinates leniently…」

She said, bowing before me and lowering her head.
And when she did… that.
I could see. Two gentle slopes within her yukata.
Crap, things are getting heated up here. Though I wish it was my son that was getting heated up… real shame.
But, nothing I can do about that. Men are creatures who can never forget the heat of an “adventure”!
At times like this I am truly glad this body doesn’t get nosebleeds.
But, yukata, huh. Amazing, I must say. It has terrifying potential.
And the sight of a woman right out of a bath is the best.
Compounded with the fact that this woman is a beauty… the combined effects are truly terrifying.
I lost… I’ve been defeated. Complete defeat.
Everything is forgiven, so I say.
But then,

「Rimuru-sama, whence would you be looking?」

Shuna asked with a smile on her face.
Hmm? Her words are kind, so why do I feel a chill…
Why… how did she know?!

「No no, I’m not looking at anything.
Anyways, Hinata…
Do not apologize to me but to Shion and the Yomigaeri.
They are the victims」

I said, pointing at them.
There’s no reason to deceive them.
Shion jumped in surprise. She hadn’t expected to be called.
And to her,

「I’m sorry.
I have convinced myself that monsters are evil.
That they will attack you when you least expect them, and that they cannot be trusted…
Please forgive me…」

Hinata said, bowing even deeper.
When Hinata did so, the other knights followed.
All together, they cried『We’re sorry!』
Shion started fidgeting, making a distressed face.

「Shion, forgive them. I understand your anger and pain.
But, they are not completely evil.
Just so you know, humans are beings that surpass the errors they make.
So do consider them thoroughly. There are noble humans as well」

Shion’s discomfort intensified with my words.
She probably thinks humans are evil incarnate.
But, I wouldn’t want her to think that all humans are like that.
Her discomfort lasted a second longer,
And then with a resolved face,

「Okay! Whether a person is good or evil, I’ll decide after seeing their soul!」

She said, and faced me with a cheerful smile.
She seemed as if she had conquered some inner demon and was now cheerful again.
The Yomigaeri also forgave them.
What a good bunch. They are my pride and joy.
Let bygones be bygones.
What can and cannot be forgiven is hard to decide, but this time we were able to reconciliate.
If you meet people who listen to what you say, you can almost always learn to understand their point.
And thus, one problem was solved.

Now then, it’s not a good idea to stay gloomy.
The delicious food will get cold.
Besides, the agitated Veldora just might get even more agitated.
In fact, he’s currently occupying my clone and enjoying a meal.
He doesn’t need to eat just like me, but has been stricken by the beauty of cooking.
Now he’s just as fussy about his meals as I am.
And thus we began the banquet.
After a good bath a cold beer is must.
Of course, we have it. It’s our country’s special alcohol.
Made perfectly.
Ingracia Kingdom specializes in wine.
They do have beer, but it’s not very good. It lacks a punch… or maybe it’s not carbonated enough?
Or maybe the fact that it’s lukewarm makes it unpleasant.
Anyways, we have greatly improved upon it.
Don’t underestimate my passion for food even for a second.
In fact, if I say “I want this!” everyone immediately gets to work on making it; aren’t I scary?
I guess this is proof that I have become a demon lord, huh?.. Wasn’t it like this before?
Ah, whatever.
Thus the alcohol diversity of our country has also increased.
We import the wine and produce the beer.
Along with potato and barley shochu.
So it’s natural that the frequency of banquets has increased. My orders are faithfully being carried out and our food has gotten seriously delicious.
Even if I say let’s have a dinner, it’ll just become another banquet. No question about it.
I don’t even need Raphael’s input on this to predict the outcome.
It’s just that obvious.
The knights are awed by our dishes. I mean, for seafood, we have even made sashimi.
We don’t yet have soy sauce, but we have made a similar spice.
It’s a bit lacking, but soy sauce is currently being researched. In the meantime, we might improve this to perfection.
Oh, and then a knight who got interested in trying the black rice put some in his mouth and screamed,

「T-this! Recovers magical energy?!」

Hmm? That wasn’t a shriek I was expecting.
It’s supposed to be poisonous to humans, but I guess it is akin to medicine for those stronger?
Actually, they were essentially exhausted a second ago, so maybe that’s why.
While I was thinking these things, the other knights also expressed interest in the black rice.
It can’t be helped, let them have it.
To think that I went out of my way to make white rice and they preferred the black one…
Well, the appearance of it is bad but the taste is good. Those without extreme prejudice just might eat it without a complaint.
Tempura, Sashimi, and restorative rice has shocked them… I am looking forward to the tales they will spin about my country.
Moreover, I’m just happy to see templars and monsters enjoying a meal together.
It’s a good scene.
Maybe alcohol had a role to play here, but if such a scene can become the norm, maybe we can truly befriend each other one day.
Eat good food and spend days happily.
Such is my goal, for which I ardently struggle.
Protecting this kind of sight is my job.
So I decided yet again.

………
……

We got drunk and everyone was pretty merry.
Arnaud, a person said to be the next most powerful after Hinata, said

「By the way, Rimuru-san. Who’s the strongest in this country?」

A truly ridiculous thing.
Of course, Veldora and I were excluded from this question.
But the monsters, all immediately rose.
Arnaud said a simple phrase with no real intent behind it, but the monsters didn’t take it that way.
Chances are, there’s secret hierarchy battles going on behind my back, or maybe they decided that a strength-based ranking was a taboo.
Actually, if they made it a taboo that doesn’t solve a problem in the slightest.
At the time, even though I don’t get drunk, I think I was drunk.
Cause Veldora and I suddenly began to add oil to the fire.

「Kuahahaha! Shouldn’t that question be solved with a battle?」
「Hmm? You planning to argue about it? How about having a tournament?」

We said…
I wasn’t drunk… well, I was drunk on the atmosphere.
I just said the first thing that popped into my head.
And the moment a tournament was mentioned, the light in their eyes changes.
Though the atmosphere was light until then, things suddenly got serious.

「Kufufufu, what a wonderful idea!」

Diablo decided to join in,

「Isn’t it fine? I’m personally not against it」

And then Benimaru. And following him,

「I guess I’ll go all out」
「You guys. You’ve done well, I guess I’ll let you taste some extra training」
「I-I will also participate!」
「I’m also in~su! I’ll seriously aim higher~su!」
「Sounds good. I’ll cut everyone down!」
「I haven’t had enough fun. I want to fight proper opponents!」
「I as well, rather than constantly leading my men, want to test out my powers!」

In short, everyone wanted to participate.
By that moment, I noticed my mistake but it was far too late.
Veldora’s also having fun, and frankly, I don’t even care anymore.

Thus, the Tempest Tournament has been decided.

179 thoughts on “096. Chance to Speak

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